Dear Son, Happy Mother's Day

Dear Finn,

I write to you in a special handwritten journal, but this one I wanted to share with our readers. This is our first Mother's Day. I say 'our' because you made me a mom. Every day not only do I get to love and nourish you, but you remind me how much I'm needed and loved as well.

The beginning was rough. Ten months of carrying you around with only a couple of blurry sonogram pictures in my purse to hold onto, no drinking or sushi, peeing a lot and your foot jammed into my left rib the last three months was no piece of cake. Then you arrived. Holding you on my chest for the first time was something I will never forget. I remember everything so vividly and I was enthralled that you were actually here. Daddy and I were so grateful for your health, 10 fingers and 10 toes. Just one day later the no sleeping started. I get it. You're in a big, scary new world, and you don't know who the hell these alien-looking creatures called your 'parents' are, but sleeping one hour and up crying for five was not my cup of tea. There were a few moments of, "what the hell were we thinking", but everyone kept telling us it got better and we had to hang on and believe them.

Around the three month mark you started sleeping better and by four & a half months you were a new baby: sleeping 12 hours through the night, smiling and happy all of the time. Every memory of the sleepless nights started to drift away like a bad dream and the giggles and smiles replaced any recollection of bouncing and swaying you until our arms were going to fall off. 

This, our first Mother's Day, you will be 7 months. I don't know where the time went. Don't get me wrong, the first 6 weeks felt like 6 years, but everything after that is happening at the speed of light. I continually have to put away clothes you're growing out of, you do something new every day and I feel as though I'm losing my little baby. As excited as I am to watch you grow and see your personality come out, part of me wants you to stay small forever. You need me when you're small: you love me no matter what because it's all you know.

Giving up breastfeeding soon has made me realize that anyone can feed you and you don't have to be dependent on just me anymore. With every change and every growth spurt I fear the day you push me away when I try to hug you, or when you get frustrated with me (the way I did with my mom) and tell me you hate me for the first time. I'm not sure my heart can handle it. I brought you into this world after all. I housed you in my body, next to my heart, for 10 months and safely got you here. Now, I guess, I have to guide you, but not sMOTHER you.

This Mother's Day what I really need to do is thank MY mom because you don't know how demanding this all is until you are one. Regardless of the sleepless nights and tiny human latched onto you for 12+ hours a day, the love that I have for you after 7 months is immeasurable. I can't imagine my mom having 30 years of this. Thirty years of learning something new every day because of you. Being surprised by your every move, and getting to spend a lifetime helping to guide you to be the best source of love for your family and others that you can possibly be.

I love you, Finn. And I especially love you, Mom. I can't wait to celebrate your first Grandmother's Day.

xo, Kaitlin

 Grandma MeMe & her first grandchild, Finnley Tuxill Delaney

Grandma MeMe & her first grandchild, Finnley Tuxill Delaney


IMG_0937.jpg

Kaitlin is the co-founder of Your Beautiful Story. After many jobs she feels she has finally found her passion. Check her out on Instagram @kaitdel or the YBS team @BeYoutiful_Story.

My Birth Story

Finn and myself are getting into the swing of things, but I do want to mention this is the hardest thing I've ever done in my whole life. BUT, when I see his little face, what can I do but feel all the love in the Universe is packed into one tiny little 8 pound package that I helped create...

They Make My Beautiful Story... My Life.

Motherhood. Parenthood. Wow - how to describe and write about those words? They encompass and mean so very much. It is with endless excitement that I can say both now apply to me. It's hard to believe sometimes. “I am a mother. I am a parent. I am a mother. I am a parent.” I can say it over and over again and it may sink in a little more each time, but still seems so surreal.

It's funny how my viewpoint and thoughts have changed throughout pregnancy, birth, and now motherhood. At first, I couldn't believe I was pregnant (thankfully feeling WONDERFUL and loving EVERY minute of being pregnant). Then, I couldn't believe I had given BIRTH. I mean, wow! “I have given birth!” Again, I can say that over and over and it may sink in a little more each time. THEN, the craziest and most exciting part...I am a MOM. A mother. The happiest, excited, most grateful person to help guide, support, and love on the cutest little boy ever. Yes, cutest. :) ...but I may be a little partial.

Having a 7 month old, I can say the past 7 months have been the hardest yet the most wonderful at the same time. What a whirlwind. On the one hand, I can't believe it's already been 7 months. On the other hand, I feel like he has been in our lives forever. He is my complete joy.

We learn more and more each day about each other and I am grateful every single day. He has grown and changed so much in 7 months and I am continually torn between wanting to freeze time to enjoy him at this very age and looking forward to the future to see what exciting times lie ahead.

Before I became pregnant, I used to look at mothers of young children and think, “Wow, they are so lucky to be parents.” Then after I became pregnant, I would look at mothers and think, “Wow, they survived giving birth.” Now that I have given birth, I look at mothers and think, “They have a 2 year old… a 10 year old… a 30 year old!  I wonder how they handled this or that?”  But in all of that, I remind myself that I also have endless experiences ahead of me and I look forward to every moment!

I could not imagine these past couple months without the support from my loving husband and family. Each and every day my husband shows his kindness, patience, hardworking, unconditional love and strength to me and our son. For that, I am forever grateful. My husband, our son, and our families are my true happiness. They help me along my motherhood journey. They make my beautiful story...my life.

Intention: To encourage Mom's, both current and those that hope to be, that we should all support each other.  Be thankful for those that do and enjoy every moment with our children.

xo, Lindsay

Lindsay Shively lives in central Pennsylvania with her husband, son, and dog, Abby. In her free time, she soaks in every moment with her beautiful family and enjoys getting things checked off her to-do list. Even though that may be a bit trickier lately with a 7 month old, she wouldn’t change it for the world.

Follow Lindsay, her adorable family and pure radiance on Instagram for a reminder to appreciate true beauty in life.


When We Became Three

I’m pregnant! I still can’t believe it! Well, sometimes… then someone will order a strong cocktail or the raw fish appetizer and I’m quickly reminded!

I took a pregnancy test on Wednesday after the Super Bowl of 2014, and after a Monday hangover from too many glasses of champagne during that game… oops. We didn’t get pregnant the first month we tried so I thought it would take us awhile. Why hold back on drinking if I was already going to have to stop for at least 9 months once we found out? Much to my surprise, taking my second pregnancy test ever, seeing the word “PREGNANT” on the digital screen scared the crap out of me. Even when you’re trying to get pregnant, it’s still a surprise that moment can be even be possible.

It was a surreal moment, by myself, in our new home’s master bathroom as my husband, Ryan, was in Philadelphia on a work trip. A wave of happiness and then worry washed over me as I analyzed everything I ate, drank and did the past month. Then, the pacing started. I paced the bathroom up and down, shouting, “I’m pregnant! I’m pregnant! I’m pregnant!”, with a smile spread wide and tears streaming down my face.

My first thought was to call Ryan, but then immediately knew I wanted to tell him in person. My mom had the most fun stories of how she told my dad she was pregnant with each of us and I wanted to have the same for us. After spending the evening searching the web for, “Best Ways to Tell Your Husband You’re Pregnant”, none seemed good enough. Wracking my brain, I finally came up with something on my own. Ryan called me to say goodnight and after a few deep breaths, I answered and smoothly acted like nothing was different.

I went to work the next day with a huge smile on my face and ran an errand at lunch to find what I needed. Ryan was landing around 8pm and I needed my supplies before he got home. Leaving work that evening I wanted to speed through traffic, but drove carefully as I now had a baby on board. I finally arrived and got everything ready. Like a little girl on Christmas Eve, I patiently waited for his arrival trying to distract myself with something on TV.

I heard Ryan open the front door and start to walk up the stairs. Our golden retriever ran down to greet him and while he gave her a kiss & a rub, I hit the record button on our digital camera. As he rounded up the stairs, I walked over and he picked me up into a big hug. After giving him a kiss, I turned around to grab my engagement ring box that I had stuck a blue pacifier in. I walked back over to him and said, “I found the weirdest thing in my jewelry box today,” and gave him the black velvet box. He peeled it open and was confused, but I could tell the light bulbs were starting to turn on, one by one. Quickly, I pulled the positive pregnancy test from behind my back and he looked at me in disbelief, “Is this for real?” I think after it didn’t happen the first month we tried, we both assumed it would take a few months, or maybe even a year. I started crying and finally whispered, “We’re pregnant!”, his eyes filling with tears as well. It was one of the best moments we’ve ever shared together and I’m so glad I got it on film. We spent the next hour discussing when it could have happened, if we were hoping for a boy or girl, and how much our lives were going to change for the better.

It’s been a wild ride since and time feels like it has slowed down. I yearn to tell our family and friends, but we decided to wait until the 12-week mark, which is considered the ‘safe zone’. I ache to call my mom daily to ask her advice or bitch about a new pregnancy symptom, but know it will all be worth the wait when we see their reactions in person.

I’m excited for our next adventures and feel extremely blessed that we were able to get pregnant so quickly. I try not to worry and pray daily for a healthy, happy, strong, mild mannered, smart and spiritual baby. I can’t wait to tell him or her they can be and do anything their heart desires. I also can’t wait for them to teach me, and for us to grow together as a family. I’m so lucky to have Ryan as my partner. I couldn’t do it without him.

INTENTION: To learn from our children and grow into our best possible selves.

xo, Kaitlin


Kaitlin is the co-founder of Your Beautiful Story. After many jobs she feels she has finally found her passion. Check her out on Instagram @kaitdel or the YBS team @BeYoutiful_Story.